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dissociation

by Push to Shove

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    This high quality CD comes in a digipack with an illustrated lyric book. Illustrations by Anthony Christopher and coloring and graphic design by Garth von Ahnen.

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1.
I'm gone with my soul I'm searching inside I've gone down that hole for a ride Confection, confection A beast starved direction He calls insurrection to avoid detection Keep in mind, the burrow's inside Now it's time for the horrors again Will you come again? Throw in all your faults Will you dance again, to the devil's waltz Is it him? Is it me? Once you dance you can never be free Show to catch, on his trail Chase to no avail! I'm gone with my soul I like the feeling it brings I see down that hole As it sings... It's Devil Talk Keep in mind, the devil's inside Now it's time for the horrors again Will you come again? Throw in all your faults Will you dance again to the devil's waltz I'm gone with my soul I'm searching inside I've gone down that hole For a ride
2.
Aegis #2 04:51
Everybody here knows everybody “for sure” cause everybody’s connected A caste of avarice, an empire of vice, a hierarchy of access When the bar closes down, we make like we’re leaving but fiending eyes can see just what’s beginning behind the closing sign... I say I don’t like it, but I do it I say I don’t like it at all Strung in! Treading quicksand, discreet little succubus, tempting me again Strung out! From this generous web. I’m cut off. Set adrift. Such a turbulent end But I’ve never slept so well, than in the eye of a storm I’m drained but I’m invincible... I say I don’t like it, but I do it I say I don’t like it at all Should we barricade the door? Perhaps set up surveillance? Out of sight, out of mind Such a curious solution Out of sight out of mind... Out of sight out of mind... Out of sight out of mind... Yeah right Grind it down! Line it up! Ignore your face in the mirror But you can’t miss your reflection in them eyes around you, peering over your shoulder It’s a strange reflex, luring me back on so many insistences But I can rest assured, we’re all friends here “for sure,” cause everybody’s connected... I say I don’t like it, but I do it I say I don’t like it at all
3.
Narcissus 04:33
I’m so pretty, I’m the only thing that matters I’m so lovely, in an ugly world that doesn’t care About the beauty, that is me and I don’t believe you won’t agree Tell me everyone is watching, dear Echo And I’ll hang off your every word Show me everyone is jealous, dearest Mirror So I can sense my self-worth And tell me I’m Special: a unique snowflake And tell me I’m blameless: incapable of mistakes Unlike You I feel empty... and I’m sure you’re to blame You deserve my tantrum, this ugly world has let me down Now you’ll pay me attention, Tension... if it’s the last thing you ever do “You” don’t exist “You” can’t be real There’s no “You” beyond “Me” No reality outside my dream My dream... My dream... My dream
4.
Trailblazers 01:55
I get lost in troubled ways Stricken down by violent haze I was lost in a Hell I know, got ‘Least two decades more to go Cracked up by complacency, got Told I’m old audaciously, I ne- Ver realized that my opinions Don’t extend to my dominions Passing through this modern day Sense is left off by the way Dogmatically dismiss my views So long as I can make my dues I call what I see Wanna know what I see? I see those who Disappear away from physical Shape their minds around something quizzical Beaming out with all it’s might Images I cannot fight Only show what they want to show I’m Toshiba I’m Casio I don’t believe in this I don’t believe in you Where do I go now? I was there in time Will you be my bride? Wire shock and iron plough I am in there here and now I have crossed beyond the pale Calls of time I must avail Two halves of my time, I have Begun the climb. But When you’re held by forced admission Hard to end the old tradition Fervently towards it’s fall All is one and one for all The world has never seemed so true Now it’s time, I die with you Closer closer in my sleep, I’m Closer closer in my sleep, I’m Closer closer in my sleep, I’m Raaaaahhh
5.
She’s got a ghost; you can bet it’s a smart One Dead but still breathing, in a recess of her Heart At night she can hear it say, “Don’t you worry babe, if you can’t let go I’ll stay, won’t leave you babe, baby, you’re alright, just sleep tight” My old man said, “Son, you can’t save them all You’ll burnout on the weight of it, you’ll break down, you’ll fall” My grandma said, “Boy, there’s plenty of guilt in this world Don’t you take more than you earned, you can’t save them all” He’s got a ghost; you can bet it’s a funny One Dead but still joking, cracking wise in the back of his Mind At night his words turn sincere, “I’m still here. If you can’t stay awake I’ll take the watch tonight, believe me you’re all right, just sleep tight” My old man said, “Son, you can’t save them all You’ll burnout on the weight of it, you’ll break down, you’ll fall” My grandma said, “Boy, there’s plenty of guilt in this world Don’t you take more than you earned, you can’t save them all” The kid’s got a ghost, you can bet it’s a tall One Don’t yet know what dead is: What’s lost but not gone? At night he can hear it pray, “Hallelujah babe” At the bedside through the gray, “Hallelujah, may you be okay, just sleep tight” My old man said, “Son, you can’t save them all You’ll burnout on the weight of it, you’ll break down, you’ll fall My grandma said, “Boy, there’s plenty of guilt in this world Don’t you take more than you earned, you can’t save them all” But what a difference it’d have made to have saved One To a Heart, a Mind, and a Soul, living each day to get old What a difference it’d have made to those days to have saved One
6.
Punchline 07:31
I knew that there was something going on It was suspicious what you wouldn't talk about Such a letdown to have given my trust only to find Every intention to verify Life’s a joke, love’s the punchline Yo mama heard the tale countless times First the set-up, then the twist Everyone chuckles while you try to make sense of it And I laughed so hard I could cry I laughed so hard I could cry Love’s a joke, I’m the punchline My mother will hear this sad tale one time You like the slapstick, yeah? I’ll pull out the rug You’re tumbling over while I’m cracking up And I laughed so hard I could cry I laughed so hard I could cry It’s just a cliché to everyone but you (Your heart aches) It’s just a cliché to everyone... Your heart aches I told my joke, but no one’s laughing... Well, I guess you just would have had to have been there It didn’t help at all: having the last laugh It didn’t help, it didn’t help at all Laughing alone
7.
Ooo baby, I’ve been around. I heard the darkness at the edge of town Ooo woman, this cynical heart was busted up at the start Ooo baby, I felt the harm that comes from dropping my guard It’s not easy to forget Times vulnerability led to regret If Love & Courage are the same damn thing For you, I’ll be brave Ooo baby, in your eyes it’s clear. You been let down by someone insincere Ooo woman, some charlatan, acted magnetic but he was made of tin Ooo baby, you felt the harm that can come from dropping your guard It’s not easy to forget The times vulnerability led to regret If Love & Courage are the same damn thing For you, I’ll be brave I’ve been left, I’ve been stuck for rent Learned to bounce from leaps of faith My heart’s never been broken only broken open A little bit wider, little bit wiser A little bit stronger for you Ooo baby, I wanna believe in you, give you reason to believe in me too Ooo woman, we could trust again, we’ll show each other how to begin Ooo baby, we could feel the warmth that could come from dropping our guns We don’t have to forget The times vulnerability led to regret If love & courage are the same damn thing For you, I’ll be brave
8.
Handsome 02:55
He enters with a smile He’ll keep you going a while He got that trick, makes the room click He’ll always play it with style Ooo, ooo, He’s so Handsome Oh yes, He’s Handsome He came in like a breeze His eyes, always seem to tease He comes in close, shimmy as He goes His mind is made to please Oooo, He’s Handsome My, He’s just Handsome When it comes to my love He’s got me, he’s got me What I’m thinking of He’s got me, he’s got me When they all look away He’s got me, he’s got me At the end of the day He’s got me He slowly centers the light ‘Round Him it’s never uptight He’s got that ride, the party’s come inside He’s like a meteorite Ooo, ooo He’s so Handsome Oo Why why why why he’s so Handsome? He’s Handsome He’s Handsome Ooo, he’s Handsome
9.
Care Less 03:54
Everyone I know thinks a certain way But not everyone I know is quite everyone It’s not even everyone in my hometown It’s not even everyone in this room No, I - I couldn’t care less Everything I know follows certain rules Not everything I know is everything It’s not even everything that could have been It’s not even everything that makes up my life Oh, I - I couldn’t care less Girl looks good Friend is on point Mind is at ease Shaking my joints Oh, I - I couldn’t care less

credits

released June 10, 2022

Push to Shove
Ethan Johnson -- Vocals, Bass
Tom Patrick -- Vocals, Rhythm Guitar
Erick Zuniga -- Lead Guitar
Heathen Gein -- Drums

dissociation
Recorded and Mixed by Chris Lee at The VCR
Mastered by Mike Hagler at Kingsize Sound Labs
Illustrations by Anthony Christopher
Coloring and Graphic Design by Garth von Ahnen

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Push to Shove Chicago, Illinois

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